Final Ten Divorce/Break-Up Songs that Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit: W-Y (There is no "Z.")

My goal tonight is to get the rest of these songs done so I can start writing about something else again. It's been a strange experience, spending all this time on songs I don't even like, but also kind of cathartic. I think when a relationship goes wrong we all suffer a sort of flux for awhile wherein we're trying to figure out where things went wrong and what we could have done differently. In fact, I'm starting to feel that way about this series of blogs but, if nothing else, listening to these songs has made me feel better on one score: At least I never took my grief and made horrible music to torment the ears of others with -- I've gone and made it into terrible writing instead.

1.) What Could Have Been Love, by Arrowsmith. I don't literally cry when I hear it, but "now that I'm alone all I have is emptiness that comes from being free" is downright depressing. If that's the intent, then this song is right on the mark.



2.) Mary Chapin Carpenter came out under the label of country music, but over the years her singing has taken on such political overtones that to me she's more like the folk singers of old. Whatever she is, she's really good at depressing me as well ~ What to Keep and What to Throw Away:



3.) This next song I find kind of comical. It's VERY Country, I've never heard of Loudon Wainwright III or this song Whatever Happened to Us, and don't know what "Argosy" is, yet I'm intrigued by the phrase "my proverbial heart." There's a deep thinker buried somewhere inside this simplistic song, and it's just enough to make you vomit.

4.) Who's Going to Ride Your Wild Horses? ~U2 Am I going to vomit or am I going to cry? I always liked U2, so I don't dislike the song, but it kind of sounds like many of their other songs, and I don't think I ever really listened to the lyrics very closely before. This lady who leaves the man in the song sounds like trouble, all right. He's most likely better off without her.

5.) From 1972, Woman's Gotta Have It, by Bobby Womack, is written as a little word of advice from a man who "had a love and lost her." It's pretty awful, but this previous line in quotes does qualify the song for our list.

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6.) Everclear's Wonderful reminds me more of Contemporary Christian pop music more so than alternative rock -- and I do mean contempt. Then again, it's pretty good music for fourteen-year-olds, and there sure are a lot of those coming out of broken homes. Poor kids. For them life may never seem quite right again. So much depends on how maturely their parents handle it. Just makes me want to vomit.
I did see a therapist once after my divorce who was adamantly against this Divorced Parent Bashing that goes on -- The way people sling around remarks about "broken homes" and how screwed up the kids are going to be, etc. She'd done some research and found that, statistically, children of divorce are not only just as well-balanced as many kids with married parents: They even do better in some ways, such as in being adaptable and seeing things from more than one point of view. So maybe I think this song is pretty bad, but rest assured if you also are a single parent, I have nothing at all against you. Just try to be honest and keep the lines of communication open with those kids.



7.) Along those lines, here's a song that really bothered me one evening on the oldies station when I was driving home alone after dropping my kids off at their dad's house: Cher, singing what Sonny Bono wrote, You Better Sit Down Kids. It's obviously told from the man's point of view, and yet I guess Sonny was no way going to pull that song off and actually sell it to anyone. I mean, Sonny Bono was already a terrible singer. If you add divorce to that it's downright depressing, so here's his ex-wife...



8.) This next song I hate more than all of the songs in this entire blog series, all together. My mom always sang along to it when it came on the radio, even (or especially) when she was still married to dad. Now that I've been married and divorced myself, this is just too much for me to take.



9.) Now in contrast to Barbara Streisand and Neil Diamond's insipid song, we've got Velvet Revolver's repulsive song, You Got No Right. Something about the way the music drags along and the singer sounds as if he's forcing his words through some kind of thick fog, really makes me nauseous. Enjoy!



10.) Oh, Dixie Chicks, why did you have to write this song and torment ex-wives everywhere? I'll bet women listening to the country music station everywhere cry their eyes out when this song comes on. I can't actually relate from a personal point of view because my ex to date hasn't remarried, and I highly doubt I'm going to give a care if he does. That ship sailed so long ago I think you could call it The Titanic. "He's two and she's four" made even me tear up a little bit, though. Poor babies. By the way, the song is called You Were Mine...



There you have it, folks.
I hope you're as relieved as I am to have made it through this blog series.
Next time I write, it's going to be a one-time entry on Divorce/Break-Up Songs that I love to sing to, so expect to feel empowered, inspired, and ready to sing along.

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Divorce/Break-Up Songs that Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 15 -19 out of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letters "N - Q."

I've been busy the past couple of weeks doing important things like, you know, living my life and all that, but I want you to know that I have not forgotten you. I'm sure you've been losing sleep nights wondering if I'll ever get to songs starting with the letter "Z," right? It so happens that I, too, have been anxious in this regard. I can't help but look forward to what on earth I may find when I google Divorce/Break-Up songs that begin with the letter "Z." But right now we're a little over halfway through the alphabet, so we'd best buckle down and get to work.


1.) Today's first Break-Up Song is by The Black Keys. Although Next Girl isn't a particularly good song, this group has always surprised me with their style and overall presentation. If this number is especially bad, at least it's brief, right?



2.) I can't dream of why Tegan and Sara's song Night Watch wasn't more popular, coming out as it did in the era of Nirvana... [Sarcasm Font]
Have you ever heard of them? If so, you're definitely one up on me. If not, I looked them up on Wikipedia for you: "Tegan and Sara is a Canadian/Indi, Indie/Pop duo formed in 1995 in Calgary, Alberta, Canada composed of identical twin sisters Tegan Rain Quin and Sara Keirsten Quin." 
I suppose it was the gimmicky twin-factor that did Canadian hearts good in 1995, and I am just jealous that I don't have a twin sister to write songs with...or have any musical talent at all, whatsoever...



3.) Eric Clapton's Old Love. There's nothing at all to the lyrics, and no reason the song should run for six minutes and twenty-seven seconds, except that it's Eric Clapton, man, and he does what he wants. He was cited at the fourth best guitarist out of one hundred in Rolling Stone Magazine (Here's the address, if you're curious, but we all know Number One had to have been Jimmy Hendrix: http://www.rollingstone.com/music/lists/100-greatest-guitarists-of-all-time-19691231/jimi-hendrix-20101202 ), so I guess we can attribute the song's fame for all the guitar playing Clapton gets to do in this song. Eric, I wish my old love would go away, too, but singing about it for over six minutes isn't going to help.




4.) On My Own. Sadly, not the song from Les Mis. The lyrics are pretty good, but this is just not my kind of music. I really hate it. The one part that makes me laugh a little, though, is: "Now we're up to talking divorce, and we aren't even married..."



5.) I guess you know it's all a matter of taste, that I can criticize Patty Labelle and still really love Jim Croce's Operator, but I just can't help it. I heard this song during my formative years and thought it was kind of sweet. "My best old ex-friend, Ray" is just about the most pathetic phrase in any break-up song I've ever heard. I relate to the idea of trying to get rid of a feeling that you have for someone who chose to disengage from you entirely, and also that need to show them up by acting as if you've got it all together and don't care anymore, either. This song doesn't make me physically weep, but my heart is crying. ha ha



6.) Usher's Papers. As an artist, I think he crosses all kinds of boundaries. The bland pleasantness of the music for the subject matter is kind of off, but I can't quite bring myself to vomit over that. 



7.) Pendulum, by Anastacia, "the little woman with the big voice," is a study in break-up denial, but I love the strength she's shown personally in battling breast cancer.



8.) Genesis's Please Don't Ask, proving once again that old adage: "The majority of people who say 'I'm fine' are just lying." 



9.) Quick -- The song's a little weird at first blush, but there's something about Jill Scott that I can't help but like -- Maybe it's because she almost became an English Teacher. I'll bet the world lost a good one. By the way, The No1 Ladies' Detective Agency was a very good book.



Well, I couldn't find a number ten, so that's it for the week, I think. 
I still maintain that after I've finished this long and sorry exploration of Divorce/Break-up songs that make me want to cry/vomit, I'll be more than happy to go into Empowerment Songs next. Play 'em if you've got 'em.

Divorce/Break-Up Songs that Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 14 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "M."

1.) One lovely thing about researching Divorce/Break-Up songs has been the insight that I've gained in the process. In this particular example, I have finally figured out just what exactly is wrong with Kanye West: Oedipus Complex. Whatever else may be disturbing about his character or temper, one can't help but feel a little softness for a man who so clearly loved his mother. She was a talented, creative and intelligent woman in her own right, so it's no wonder that her child might write a song about being jealous of her boyfriends and trying not to become like them one day. Assuming the song is based on life, of course. Of course, I may just be saying all this because she was an English Professor for roughly 31 years, and I most certainly do have a soft spot in my heart for educators. Anyway, from Donda West's son: Mama's Boyfriend.



2.) Mean, by Pink. She seems to know something about it. Kind of depressing. meh.



3.) Memphis, Tennessee was originally sung by Johnny Reed in 1964. Either covered by Reed or ChucK Berry, the song is the same -- I had to listen to it twice to realize that the "Marie" that the man in the song is singing about is his daughter and not his ex -- He gives it away at the end when he points out she was only six. This ending is the clincher here. It's that style of singing, though, where the tune is kind of monotonous and the singer isn't very expressive, so according to my lights it only gets a vomit. He did, however, sing Secret Agent Man in 1966. That's a fun one. Kind of dumb, but fun.



4.) Did you know The Drifters sang a song called Mexican Divorce? Me, neither. It's just like all their other songs, except not about making out under a boardwalk, and with an occasional female chorus. I thought maybe I've never heard of it because it was racist or something, but now that I've heard it, I think it was just bad. Vomit.



5.) Miss You, The Rolling Stones. It's The Stones, man. What can I say?
I used to find Mick Jagger kind of creepy, and so the video grossed me right out as a teen. I'm sure they've got better songs, and this one drags awfully long for what little it has to say, but, again -- The Stones.



6.) Misunderstanding, Genesis. For just a minute I thought I'd never heard this song before, but hey, it's Genesis. I knew. In a way I suppose it's no different than the issue I take with the Drifters' song: Doesn't sound as upset as the words would indicate. Sounds pretty dated, and not much to it. No tears or vomit to be had here.



7.) The Moment of Truth, Matthew West. One of those Christian music songs where the singer is addressing his audience, making it sound as if he's giving advice to one specific guy who's listening to the words. Is he listening? I wouldn't be, just because the music is bad. It pains me that so much of this music is either boring, tacky, elitist, or just a poor copy of rock music. This is in part because these songs are way more about what the artists are trying to say about their religious beliefs than whether or not the music is well-written. You can find some deep messages with a lot to say, but the music kind of ruins it much of the time. It's not all bad, and this song's message isn't all bad, but once the divorce or break-up has already happened, it takes a lot of work to pull it all back together. I guess it's the question we all end up asking, "Is this worth it?"



8.) My Bed, Sunny Sweeny. I hate this song. It makes me want to vomit.



9.) I know these are supposed to be songs that start with an "M," but this song popped up along with Sunny's other sunshiny little numbers, and I just have to remark: Drink Myself Single, also sung by Sunny Sweeny, is the epitome of all that's awful about country music. She's mad at her partner, decides to dress in her low-cut top and tight blue jeans, and then go out and get staggering drunk so that she can find out what it's like to sneak home late after sleeping around like he does. Great. That'll really help you make some wise choices and improve your life. I hate music that encourages people to abuse alcohol and and/or act stupid. VOMIT



10.) When My First Wife Left Me  ~ The lyrics aren't good. The guy lost his wife, rightfully blames himself, and then sings about it, but it's John Lee Hooker, and that man sure does have the perfect voice for the blues. He's good, too good to mock. Probably too good even for me to comprehend.




Well, I don't know about you, but I'm glad all that's over!
The blues number was easily the best music in the bunch, more because of who sang it than what it said on its own. The rest of the songs were pretty Miserable.

Tune in Next Time for some songs that start with the letters NO!

Divorce/Break-Up Songs that Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 12 & 13 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "L," and a Couple of "M's."

Turns out I couldn't find very many Divorce Break-Up songs that begin with the letter "L," but no worries -- There's still plenty of misery available for this one day, and enough misery to go around still tomorrow. 

Although I started on this subject as a response toward songs that made me mad or sad, I am finding, as my sister once told me, "The reason there are so many songs about having a broken heart is because that really happens to a lot of people all the time, and that really is a big deal." It was nice to hear it, simply because I'm so prideful that I don't want to admit that someone could make me feel so bad about myself or my life. I try to shove things down and be stoic about them when really writing or singing a song, writing a poem or short story or letter, or even painting about what hurts -- No matter how truly awful, funny, sad or true to life that expression of your feelings may turn out to be, it's best to let yourself grieve before moving on. Otherwise, you stay stuck in this mode and start weeping at odd moments, like when Can't Help Falling in Love is playing at some gas station, or you get angry when you hear Queen over the sound system in a department store singing Crazy Little Thing Called Love because it's just so horribly cheerful. In the end, you can use that time to put the power back into your own hands where it belongs. You don't have to allow someone to make you feel bad or question yourself. You've got the power to get over them and let them go. I guess what I'm saying is, "Listen to these songs and wallow in misery if you must, but if I could I'd choose to make you laugh. You deserve that gift, so go ahead and give it to yourself."


1.) Ben Folds' Landed. It's okay. Not the kind to make me cry or vomit, but it's simple and it does what it came here to do.



2.) In Love for a Child, Jason Mraz sings about being a child of divorce. Having no idea what the reference to the pool and losing memory was about, I looked the song up. I read that every time Mr. Mraz sings this song live, he dedicates the song to his mother. In the September issue of Richmond Magazine, there's an interview stating that "While the song could be interpreted to have left Mraz feeling negative about the whole situation ...Mraz says "this is a love song... really when I look back at my life, I was loved through and through and through. So it was a really powerful song for me and to share it with them too ." 
Because it speaks of lost innocence and misunderstanding, it's a sad song all the same.



3.) I hadn't listened to more than one minute of Fishbone's Ma and Pa before I started smirking. I probably should include in my already long title "Also Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Laugh." That said, like Love for a Child, the song addresses what divorce can potentially do to children. It also suggests that there could be a better way to handle that experience so that "little sister" doesn't have to act out against all the fighting. Maybe if it were less dated it could be a better song, but for now all it does is make me want to...vomit, I guess. Laughing is not an option, and it does get less funny as I adjust to it... oh, crap. This is catchy, too. I'm going to be singing it out loud some time tonight when I least expect it because it's now stuck in my head.



4.) Made of Money, Adam Ant. It's bad. This video is pretty hard to look at, considering it's just his face and has no lyrics. Add to that the fact that the lyrics are really bad (makes me choke on my shreddies" was my personal fave) and it makes me want to vomit.



5.) Did you know that Eddie Cantor was the first to sing Makin Whoopie? I'm bemused that they were allowed to film/record this in 1928, but mind you it was before the heavy censors came raging through Hollywood. [Side Note: In case you didn't know that 1920's movies were done in color, I would like to point out that at this stage of development, historically the color process for films involved a two color (red and green) additive system that used two color negatives pasted or printed together, and I believe that this video is a result of that process]. The song about marriage and divorce (in case you didn't know), and is really rather cynical for being sung by a comedian. And for the record, by all reports Cantor was happily married and had five daughters. I'm going to end on this note despite the fact that the song is also pretty silly, this version especially so, making me want to roll my eyes like Eddie Cantor rather than laugh.



Tomorrow I'll have a list of  ten more Divorce/Break-Up songs that make me want to cry/vomit beginning with the letter "M." 

Divorce/Break-Up Songs that Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 9 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "I" ...and "K."

1.) I'm So Happy I'm Crying. Usually Sting is a great lyricist, but this song is kind of bad. I hate to say it, but I think maybe he's reached that point where he's resting on his laurels. In truth, he more or less reached that point somewhere around his 1993 album, Ten Summoner's Tales. I'm smirking a little as I type this because of his fascinating haircut in the video. The subject matter lines up nicely with Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Vomit. My apologies, but I will not be posting the Toby Keith cover. I just can't take any more.



2.) Idiot Wind~ I suspect there is a reason that this Bob Dylan song isn't all that well known, and I further suspect that no one ever wants to get on Bob Dylan's bad side.



3.) In If Leaving Me Is Easy, Phil Collins kind of makes me want to vomit. Get over it, man. Move on. These lyrics are insipid and so is the music. I'll see you an In the Air Tonight and raise you a One More Night.



4.) In Pieces ~ Linkin Park. Not terribly impressed. Bleh



5.) Speaking of In The Air Tonight... I think what makes this song effective is that it comes from a firm perspective of rejecting the other person as opposed to the part of us all that likes to pity ourselves.



6.) It's Over, sung by Rod Stewart. I like a few of Rod Stewart's songs, but this is not one of them. The lyrics place it undeniably on this list, but I don't have to like it.



7.) This is the song that comes on at two in the morning when you're driving home from someplace you didn't want to be, don't want to be on the road, and are struggling to stay awake. Then good old Carole King comes on the radio singing It's Too Late, Baby and you nearly get into a car accident, unless you're quick to turn to another station. If there's anything to be said about this song, it would be that she tries to be grateful for what was good about the relationship. I think being able to acknowledge something like that at the end of a relationship helps you feel better prepared for another one -- certainly more so than spending too much of your time dwelling on the bad times and either hating your ex or yourself for mistakes made.



Now, luckily for you, I have run out of Divorce/Break-Up songs that start with an "I," and I have found no Divorce/Break-Up songs that begin with "J."
Unfortunately for you, I'm ending this list on a low note, because I did find just one single song beginning with a "K......

8.) Ending on an even number, I present to you possibly one of the worst bands of all time: Abba, cheerfully singing Knowing Me, Knowing You. It's not quite as bad as Fernando, but close.



Tomorrow, or on some other day this week, we'll look at Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Vomit/Cry, 12 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "L."

Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 6&7 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letters "F" and "G."

1.) Our first song tonight has a very cheerful pop song feel to it, but if you read the lyrics it's really kind of horrible. It's kind of like how The Everly Brothers smile their matching white smiles and sing "Bye Bye Love," which by the way should have been in Songs That Begin With "B." Ah, well. Can't have them all. There's a lot of heartache out there, such as mine as I listen to Tesla singing Falling Apart. Vomit!





2.) Family Portrait. P!NK, of course. This song is depressing. Reminds me of my childhood, except that I only wished my dad would leave. The bit about having two addresses and splitting the holidays makes me feel bad because then I'm thinking of my own children. In 2001, P!NK wasn't even a blip on my radar. She seemed to blend in with a lot of other singers at the time. I think the song is sad, but still just makes me want to vomit.



3.) Fool For Your Loving ~ Whitesnake? This song is better than I suspected, but my expectations weren't all that high. I kind of like the bluesey feel the singer has in his voice, but the music and lyrics categorizes it as somewhat vomity because they just don't match up.



4.) Fortress Around Your Heart, by none other than Sting. This song doesn't actually belong on this list because I love it. I love that entire album. Sting really is fantastic with the clever lyrics. Man, it's been ages since I listened to this song, and I can still sing along. If it should happen to make you cry or vomit, please let me know.



5.) Free the Butterfly, by Suzi Quatro. This one sort of takes broken relationship depression and tries to make it into a sort of inspiring song, but it's still terrible. I won't be buying an album anytime soon.



6.) Get Her Back. Robin Thicke ~ This song commits the cardinal English Teacher Sin of changing back and forth between directly addressing the girl as "You" and then singing "Her." I don't think I want this guy to give me "that thing" I wanted. I'd prefer to ask someone else. It's a boring song. I suppose I could use it as ambient music...



7.) Get Hurt, by The Gaslight Anthem ~ This guy came to get hurt. Huh. And I don't get the line about how he hears they don't bleed in California. What's that supposed to be? Kind of repetitive. Yep, vomity all right. And victimy. Shame on you, dude. You should know better.



8.) And for some reason, Janis Ian's Getting Over You makes me sad. This is how you know you're not over someone quite yet -- when too many songs remind you of them, and make you sad when you hear them. It was easy to get over my ex husband. He made it easy for me. But when I hear this song I find myself thinking of how hard it is to get some people out of your heart and your head. Staying friends, as she refers to in this song, makes it nearly impossible, because there is no closure. Cry.



9.) Ghost ~ Katie Perry again, not sounding very inspired or original, and most of the lyrics are repetitive. Blah. And yet there's this one little stanza that caught my ear: "Something has died. Now that I have made up my mind I'll be all right, it doesn't haunt me at night." We've all gotta get there someday, someway.



10.) Goodbye ~ I liked Avril Lavigne pretty well when she released her first album, but I tired of her quickly, and this song has effected me similarly. ZZZZZZZZZZZ



11.) Last but by no means least, Goodbye, My Lover, sang by James Blunt. I find it beautiful because he manages to sing it so sadly, and with so much emotion. The way he's hanging on and waiting is depressing, but it kind of makes me want to cry. I like the song, darn it.



Well, then, now that you are properly depressed, I'll leave you to dwell on your losses until next time, when we listen to Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 8 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "H."

Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 5 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "E."

I'm pretty sure I need to start doing more than one letter a day for these songs, but it does come in handy on days when I'm in a hurry. If all goes well, we'll have five songs that start with "E" this morning, and then I will see you tomorrow, maybe. Or not. I'm pretty busy on Sundays.

1.) First song on my list: Emergency, by Paramore. Should I vomit or cry? I have no opinion of this one. It seems rather generic to me, so my response is pure apathy. If it should happen too affect you more strongly than this, let me know, 'cause I got nuttin.



2.) Every Breath You Take ~ The Police. Was this song ever romantic to anyone out there? I personally looked at it as possibly the most creepy stalker song ever, even in 1984 when I was in Elementary School. Although I have always enjoyed Sting as an artist, stalking is not cool, so this merits a certain amount of spillage.



3.) Evil Eye, by Josh Ritter. Oh. My. Goodness! Now, this song is just hysterical! I'm not crying, I'm not vomiting -- I'm just sitting here watching the video and smirking.



As it turns out, I was unable to use two of the songs. One of them, by a group called Lighthouse, was actually a praise and worship song about being close to God. This seemed a strange choice for Google, but you never can tell with the Internet. It's like a box of chocolates.

Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 4 of 26 ~ Songs That Start With the Letter "D."

In today's journey into the heartbreak and tears of bad music fans everywhere, I give you just five songs that start with the letter "D."

I'm actually beginning my list of songs (that either make me want to cry/vomit) feeling a strange sensation that is neither tears nor upchuck, but rather a sort of resigned acceptance, bordering upon admiration.

1.) In 1968, Tammy Wynette became the first ever person to sing about divorce. Were it not for Ms Wynette, I would have no divorce songs to complain about. And yet here she is in her bleached blonde bouffant, singing from her heart and personal experience the helpless grief of knowing that you're making a decision that you fear will steal all your child's sense of happy innocence, security and trust. I know how that feels. 

D-I-V-O-R-C-E The song is old, and it would be almost satirical or sappy if anyone else had sung it, but I think Tammy's got a beautiful voice and puts just the right level of emotion into what she's singing. Furthermore, women everywhere were given a voice in a matter that no one at the time liked to discuss. She was a gutsy lady in this respect, and therefore has earned my respect despite my lifetime abhorrence of sad country songs that dwell on the negative side of divorce and heartbreak.

I wanted to make fun of this song, I really did, but just you look at her face as she's singing -- I took one look at her face and had to give in. Shoot, if I were the guy in this situation, I'd take one look at that face and renew our vows right on the spot.

2.) On the other hand, Wayne Newton totally makes me want to vomit, singing Daddy, Don't You Walk So Fast? Terrible song. And why was this guy ever popular? I'm glad I wasn't born yet when this song came out, because I'm sure it would have made me spit up more than a little. Wayne, you get a "D."

3.) Doesn't Anybody Stay Together Anymore? To be or not to be, this is definitely the question that created this blog series. Did you know that Phil Collins used to have hair? Me, Neither. And I don't mean just a ring around his head, or even just an ordinary amount of hair -- I mean like, a LOT of hair! Amazing. In my personal opinion, this song is kind of generic for Collins. He has much better stuff out there, but the song asks a valid question. I don't cry when I hear this one because it's just not very emotional, and I don't vomit, but I do feel a little queasy...

4.) Don't Give Up on Love, Sanctus Real. I neither love nor hate this song. Total indifference. Oh, sort of a Christian Rock Song. Wait, wait a minute... These are the guys responsible for that horrible Lead Me song, that makes me want to vomit! But that starts with an "L," so this is the song we get today. What do you think? 

5.) Down to Earth, sung by Justin Bieber. Honestly, I have never listened to Justin Bieber. Listening to this song, I can see why people kept calling him a girl when his music first came out. The lyrics are kind of sad, but I don't like the song much. Not my preference in music. Then again, neither is Tammy Wynette.

Tomorrow we will be going over songs that make me want to cry or vomit, 5 of 26, Songs that Start With the Letter "E," including what I consider to be one of the ultimate stalker songs of the 80s! Can you guess which song that would be? Take a guess! 

Have a nice day!

Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 2 of 26 ~ 3 Songs That Start With the Letter "C."

1.) VOMIT ~ Change My Mind. Billy Ray Cyrus (aside from raising a class act, Greek tragedy of a daughter), comes off as a complete ass in this song. He tells some poor woman that he loves her, dumps her, and is now thinking that, although it was a lie when he told her he would love her forever, he's considering changing his mind. Well, that's all fine and dandy, Billy, my boy, but it doesn't mean you deserve to have her back again, or that she doesn't have enough self-respect to tell you to get lost.



2.) Conversation 16, The National. I don't quite know if I should laugh, cry, or vomit. This is an interesting take on a relationship gone bad. Brains, anyone? Or, as RH1no1 said on YouTube:
"If Conversation 16 was about eating brains, I want to know what conversations 15 and 17 were."




3.) VOMIT ~ Just in case you didn't get enough of our little ray of sunshine, Laura Bell Bundy, she returns for Letter C of Songs to Vomit to, singing Curse the Bed at Walmart. Yeah, you heard me right. She burns the bed and then dances around the charred frame dressed in white and drinking champagne. The music is pretty sedate next to the lyrics. Not quite sure what she was thinking here. The song is so good that this is the only copy of it I could find online that wasn't sung by a wannabe teen.



This is all I have time for this morning. If I had to pick a "favorite," I'd go with "eating my estranged partner's brains" song. Revenge never tasted so sweet?

Tomorrow: Divorce/Break-Up Songs That Make Me Want to Cry/Vomit, 
4 of 26 ~ 3 Songs That Start With the Letter "D."

Low Tolerance

Don't you ever just say something completely off the grid, on the spur of the moment, when an emotion is fresh?
I do it all the time.
I most certainly hope that it doesn't make me a bad person for all time, but I am forced to admit that at least in brief doses I am just as intolerant and ugly as anyone else.
For example, I opened the refrigerator just now, saw that I would have to buy groceries if I ever wanted to eat anything more for dinner than the same lasagna I had made last night, and exclaimed, "Oh, My God, my life sucks! I want to die!"
Not remotely true.
So why is that the first thing that pops out of my mouth?
Is there an angry, petty, suicidal little person somewhere inside who actually cannot tolerate buying groceries a moment longer?
I think not.
But there's definitely something going on in there of which I am not entirely aware.

Another example. I'm substitute teaching at a school that considers themselves "Paper Free."
To the eyes of a temporary guest, this means that everyone has their laptops and phones out, the "lesson plan" is most likely for them to go online and "watch a Power Point," and your mission, should you choose to accept it, is merely to maintain order.
For some reason, this particular class brings back every unpleasant memory I ever had from high school.
I note that students still talk about all the same things that I could barely tolerate then.
Gossip.
Clothes.
Hair.
Boys.
Who did what that was stupid.
How I am really proud of myself for doing something even more stupid than that.
I am just as bored of it all as I was my senior year of high school - Perhaps more so, because it's grating on my nerves so badly that I don't even know if I can remain long enough to accept money for this treat.
One student brazenly decides that she can't study her Power Point without trying to blast her music for the benefit of the class.

Well the boys 'round here don't listen to The Beatles
Run ole Bocephus through a jukebox needle
At a honky-tonk, where their boots stomp
All night; what? (That's right)
Yea, and what they call work, digging in the dirt
Gotta get it in the ground 'fore the rain come down
To get paid, to get the girl
In your 4 wheel drive (A country boy can survive)

Yea the boys 'round here
Drinking that ice cold beer
Talkin' 'bout girls, talkin' 'bout trucks
Runnin' them red dirt roads out, kicking up dust
The boys 'round here
Sending up a prayer to the man upstairs
Backwoods legit, don't take no sh*t
Chew tobacco, chew tobacco, chew tobacco, spit...

"Do you have headphones?" I ask coolly.
Nod.
"Then use them."

Later, a student comes and asks me why I "hate country music."
Now, I meant to say something reasonable, like "I don't hate all country music - only the songs that fail to stimulate my lymbic system and to challenge the status quo of this ill-fated microcosm of society."
But, no-oh-oh, completely off the grid, on the spur of the moment, when the emotion was fresh, I blurted out, "Because I have an I.Q."
Now, why did I, the woman who has Patsy Cline's Crazy memorized and loves listening to Johnny Cash when she's in the right mood, just insult the intelligence of two out of five people in our entire population?
Is there an angry, rural-hating intellectual snob inside whose I.Q. literally drops every time someone plays a repetitive, unoriginal, ignorant set of lyrics?

Why yes; yes there is.
Because Music is where I draw the line.

That, and possibly tacos.

Full Performance of "I Don't Know How to Love Him" from "Sadie Hawkins" ...

Yes, no one in their right mind watches this show (or course my mind has always been questionable). It has weak plots that revolve around adolescent angst, contrived storylines, bad acting, questionable morals, and is 80% set to music. But dammit, I like the music, and it's one of my guilty pleasures to curl up on the couch with some ice cream and watch.
I love this song from Jesus Christ Superstar primarily because I do excel at unrequited love, but also because once long ago I walked the streets of Toronto with my friend Dawn and her boyfriend ranting about how at least Canada has the decency to fund their arts - when I was literally stopped in my tracks by this haunting melody played on a saxophone along some side street I couldn't identify. I continued walking, falling behind my companions with a dance in my step as I dreamily listened to the music and thought of the boy I had a crush on...
Okay.
So you got it out of me.
Are you satisfied?